IMDB link: http://www.imdb.com/title/
Starring: Major Iceborg from the Fifth Element and a bunch of people from Season 4 of Bosch
Review: It started out SO WELL. It was subtle and creepy. The Spiritualist herself was well written. I really liked how well that character was written. She was pretty bad ass. BUT there was no clear line between flash back and the present.. and it needed a SMIDGEN more exposition.
And seriously, if you have any intention of watching this stop reading now.
Because I take this site’s Spoiler Promise seriously, and I tell you it is coming in like three words… maybe.
HOW CAN YOU INHERIT A HOUSE THAT QUICKLY FROM SOMEONE WHO ISN’T DEAD? Like if un-medicated delusional mom is hiding in the walls of an old mansion there’s no body right. And sure she left a note that sounds like a suicide note, but even then.. wouldn’t it be awhile before she could be declared dead? Maybe? And how the fuck did crazy mom kill dad and NO ONE NOTICED HE WAS GONE? This family has no friends, no extended family, no jobs.. He just vanished and no one thought it was weird.
See what I mean about a smidgen of exposition? At some point someone says something about “you mom’s incident” and that implied TO ME that someone knew what happened. But nope, mom was just hiding in the fucking walls waiting for people to kill. Except for that time she went shopping for a rubber Halloween clown mask – I doubt they had that lying around.
Where I found it: Amazon Prime because I’m a sucker for punishment
How much I paid for it: 1 hour and 14 minutes of my sanity
My Favorite Line: Maybe the milk is haunted.
The Money Shot: It might have been the scene where the evil entity possesses the heroine during the seance and she stands up and points accusingly across the room. And everything is tense and people freak out until another spirit touches her arm to bring her back to reality… but the mom character is still alive and the only ghost there is her protective father. So I don’t know who the fuck possessed her so I feel this disqualifies it as The Money Shot.
It’s my blog. I make the rules.
Related Links:
I love bad movies. LOVE them. I have several definitions of bad, but it all comes down to “bad on purpose” and “bad by accident”.
I will watch it if:
it can be described as science fiction, fantasy, or horror (Sometimes I will watch action comedy but these are less likely.)
it is described as a mystery or thriller and a serial killer is mentioned in the description.
it has less than three stars on Netflix
the cast includes Ron Perlman, Rutger Hauer, Henry Rollins, Bill Mosely, Bruce Campbell, Clancy Brown or Malcolm McDowell
Lovecraft, Cthulu or Dragons are mentioned in the title, tag line or box art.
- Midsommar - January 28, 2020
- Slender Man - March 4, 2019
- The Unnamable - March 2, 2019